How To: Everything

5 things everyone should know about self confidence

Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit. – E.E. Cummings

Self-confidence is defined as having a feeling of trust in your abilities, qualities and judgement. Your level of self-confidence can show in many ways: your behavior, your body language, how you speak and what you say.

Nothing is more important than how you feel and think about yourself.

A high opinion about yourself and who you are and what you do is something people often overlook or have too little of in today’s society.

We all have this negative “self talk” in our heads. Why? There are enough people out there telling us that we need to look a certain way or act a certain way to conform to society standards or else we won’t be good enough. So why do we tell ourselves that too?

Thoughts influence actions. We often overlook the power of self affirmation. Affirmations help purify our thoughts and restructure the dynamic of our brains so that we truly begin to think nothing is impossible. The word affirmation comes from the Latin affirmare, originally meaning “to make steady, strengthen.”

Professional boxer, Muhammad Ali, said he was was the greatest before he even knew he was. That was his self-affirmation. He became successful because he truly believed he was the greatest and turned his thoughts into actions.

5 things everyone should do to become more confident:

1. Stay away from negativity and bring on the positivity

This is the time to really evaluate your inner circle, including friends and family. It might seem tough to disassociate yourself from people you consider to be your “friends”; but if they are constantly attracting drama and negativity instead of positivity, can you then really call them true friends?

Be positive, even if you’re not feeling it quite yet. Put some positive enthusiasm into your interactions with others and stop focusing on the problems in your life, instead begin to focus on solutions and making positive changes.

2. Change your body language and image

This is where posture, smiling, eye contact, and speech slowly come into play. Just the simple act of pulling your shoulders back gives others the impression that you are a confident person. Smiling will not only make you feel better, but will make others feel more comfortable around you. Imagine a person with good posture and a smile and you’ll be envisioning someone who is self-confident. Body language makes up 93% of the social communications process, opposed to verbal communication that only makes up a mere 7%.

  • Look at the person you are speaking to, not at your shoes.
  • Keeping eye contact shows confidence.
  • Speak slowly. Research has proved that those who take the time to speak slowly and clearly feel more self-confidence and appear more self-confident to others. 

3. Repeat words of affirmation to yourself everyday 

Affirmations are proven methods of self-improvement because of their ability to rewire our brains. Much like exercise, they raise the level of feel-good hormones and push our brains to form new clusters of “positive thought” neurons. A few examples of self-affirmations you could repeat to yourself:

  • My body is healthy; my mind is brilliant; my soul is tranquil.
  • I forgive those who have harmed me in my past and peacefully detach from them.
  • I possess the qualities needed to be extremely successful.
  • I am blessed with an incredible family and wonderful friends.
  • I radiate beauty, charm, and grace.
  • I am conquering my illness; I am defeating it steadily each day.
  • My obstacles are moving out of my way; my path is carved towards greatness.
  • I wake up today with strength in my heart and clarity in my mind.
  • My fears of tomorrow are simply melting away.
  • I am at peace with all that has happened, is happening, and will happen.

4. Don’t accept failure and get rid of the negative self-talk

Never give up. Never accept failure. There is a solution to everything, so why would you want to throw in the towel? Succeeding through great adversity is a huge confidence booster.

If you are constantly putting yourself down by telling yourself that you’re not good enough, aren’t attractive enough, aren’t smart enough or athletic enough, you are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. You are becoming what you are preaching inside your head, and that’s not good. I cannot stretch this enough: Your thoughts influence your actions

5. Be prepared

Learn everything there is to know about your field, job, presentation; whatever is next on your “to conquer” list. If you are prepared, and have the knowledge to back it up, your self-confidence will soar. Knowledge truly is power. Find out what your talents are and work hard at them until you are the best. 

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